Welcome, Im here to document and share personal projects across multiple pages. This is less of a site and more a memoir of my life and the projects I start (and rarely finish) thoughout my time in this world. It also serves as a commentary of my personal thoughts and reflections.
To say that I was here, before the hypothetical death of the internet. To prove that I exist, just like everyone else. The internet has been a huge part of my life, along with many others, and while my social media sites say the same, they arent mine. Sure, you could say that this little neocities site isnt mine either, but atleast I have control over how it looks, the words sprawlled across the screen, the bits and bites used to build this site are dictated by my fingers and the keys they have pressed on a friday evening in a moment of loneliness. This site, is more mine, than any social media will allow me its ownership. Taking an empty web based IDE to build a website that I could have self hosted, I still construct a site all the same using decade old documentation older than I am. This site shows that I exist, I am real, I am real. A privilege that not every souls gets to solidify at such a minimal level.
I am Mosvelt. Well, I act as Mosvelt on the internet. But on a more intermate level, I, too, am a human. I have flaws, feelings, ideas and appreciations. I am a nicotine addict, once vaping and now using nicotine pouches. I am a nerd, I appreciate the game of old and revel in the creation of modern computing yet still yearn the nostalgia of a time before me. Im 5' 10", 18 Years old and with the love of my life. I studied Esports at college for 2 years and realised after the first that it wasnt a smart idea as all I can manage is to int on league of legends as a schitzo jungler. I hop from game to game searching for 'the one' and cant find what I deem 'worth my time'. I dont know what I want to do with my future, which accurately explains why I work as a sheet metal manufacturer, its decent money and my coworkers are an enjoyable bunch, but I cant shake the feeling that its not what I want to do with my life. I dont know what I want to do, but I know what I dont want to engage with. Im not religous, but im not closed to the idea of a higher power, a sentience that judges me because, in the end, we're all sentient being that judge one another anyway. I dont hate my personal image, but I dont like it either. I dont have an idea of who I am, what I want to look like and yet I still remain unhappy. Expected but still uncomfortable. I have interests in art, code, games, computer hardware, questioning the unquestionable, puzzles and writing but not reading. I understand that the brain is sophisticated and yet the knowledge it chooses to absorb often renders useless outside of very specific and rare scenarios and yet it serves me comfort all the same. However, with such sophistication, I struggle to verbalise my emotions. I am disconnected from my own feelings and it often presents me as tone deaf. I struggle to have serious conversations with people. My mind tells me 'If people arent laughing with you, they will laugh at you, so make them laugh', but this theology has extended further. I can't connect to my emotions properly, I mostly remain neutral, and simply exist. I like Dungeons and Dragons, the concept more than the recent change in direction that both Hasbro and WOTC have taken, yet never actually play it. Mostly due to loneliness, but also due to life getting in the way. Im an adult now, and I have a job, a thought that repeats in my mind every so often and leaves savoury aftertastes in my mind.
I think what Im trying to say is that we're all complex, we're all real, but not everyone gets that chance to say or show that on such a wide scale. So if you are reading this, then hello fellow human, and thank you for taking the time to entertain your curiosity.
